Sticks and stones may be able to break bones, but words are also capable of causing serious harm. Receiving negative comments from other people and hearing comments made about other people’s weight can be triggering. These comments are not asked for and they are certainly not helpful. If you notice that someone has physically changed and their weight has gone up or down, the best thing to say is absolutely nothing at all. Commenting on weight loss or gain perpetuates the idea that size is tied to our value as humans. We rarely know what is going on in someone else’s life and how it is impacting their health. Weight fluctuates naturally and we do not want to comment on a fluctuation that was the result of declining mental health or physical illness. If you feel like making a comment to encourage someone, then it is better to focus on inherent qualities or support their health-honoring behaviors. If someone makes a comment about your body and it makes you uncomfortable then it is okay to set a healthy boundary and ask them to stop. Here are some potential responses to unwanted comments related to weight:

• Have you gained/lost weight?
  • I try not to focus on my weight but on behaviors that help improve and support my physical and mental health.
• You are so fat/skinny.
  • My body size is none of your concern. I am working to heal my body image and would prefer to focus on my inherent qualities instead of my appearance or weight.